Superman was my Father!

My father was born as a Half Black/Half Indian Man. His mother was a full blooded American Indian, of some Tribe, although I don’t know which one. He had two sisters; Aunt Pinkie and Aunt Kate and they all had prominent cheek bones, which gave them a distinct American Indian look, although they were dark brown skinned, in complexion. God rest all three or their souls! My Father also had a unique ‘Bang’, as they called it. It was almost a separate patch of hair that ran completely against the grain of the rest of his hair and hung over the front of his fore head. My father had beautiful, curly hair that the women raved over. He was born in St. Francisville, Louisiana; in 1915. He never graduated the second grade, because he had to go to work on the Sugarcane Farm, to help support his family. He also worked in Saw Mills and other hard labor jobs.

In 1942, I believe; maybe a few years later; my father moved to Akron, Ohio; which had been one of the fastest growing cities in the nation, due to the explosion of the Rubber and Auto Industries (The Industrial Revolution). He met a beautiful, well dressed, well spoken woman, with a High School Education. She had a bubbly personality and she was very popular. This woman was born as a Black Woman; in Sunflower, Mississippi; in 1916. She moved to Akron in 1926. She had a Step-mother who was mean, which I suspect is the reason for her uncommon sophistication, which was rare to find in a Black Woman who was born in such a small country town in 1916. You would have thought my mother was born with a Silver Spoon in her mouth, to look at her and to listen to her talk. But nothing could be further from the truth. I must also say that some of the mean temperament of her Step-mother had definitely rubbed off on her, as well.

As the story goes, my mother saw something in my father, who most women in Akron, Ohio probably looked at as somewhat of an uneducated, country, drunk, at the time. He was a very heavy drinker. Well, my mother saw more in this man. When he realized that such a woman was interested in him, he saw her as an opportunity of a life time. She lifted his spirits; motivated him and he stepped up his game. She made him go to the doctor, who told him he had better quit drinking and he quit that day. As far as I know, he never took another drink the rest of his life. Everyone had assumed he was an Alcoholic, but as it turned out, he just liked to drink a lot. He had absolutely no withdrawal symptoms or cravings.

Both my mother and father agree that she made him marry her. He didn’t want to get married. But as I stated before; my mother saw something in this man. And he didn’t disappoint her. My father worked at B.F. Goodrich for 37 years, was never late and only missed one day. I remember that day, in 1975. It was below zero and we were moving. I remember him saying “I have never missed a day of work; but I’m not going to work today.” My mother and I were shocked! But we were so grateful that day; because out of all days, we needed him, that day! As much as he took pride in his Work Ethic and Attendance Record at work, he put his family first, that day. I looked in my mother’s eyes when he said that and they were full of tears!

My father force himself to learn to read, although probably at a mere Sixth Grade level. He could also tell time. My Aunt Kate had learned to read, to tell time and even to how to play Piano. But my Aunt Pinkie never even learned to tell time. I mention these things only to delineate a picture of where my father came from and how far he had come. My father never learned to drive, although he drove a Forklift for B.F. Goodrich and he also worked in the Mill Room, which were both skilled jobs. So my father was certainly an intelligent man, although he never received much formal education.

My mother didn’t learn to drive until she was probably 52 years old. I was about 4 years old. My father was so proud of her! One day, he awakened us out of bed to come down stairs. He took us outside and there was a brand new car in the drive way. Brand new! Oh my God! How could we afford such a thing? You certainly couldn’t tell we could afford it by the plastic tennis shoes I was forced to wear. I got laughed at daily for the cheap shoes I was forced to wear. But there it was. I’ve never seen my mother so happy! But what I remember most, to this day, is the tears in my father’s eyes! It was so obvious, that giving that car to my mother, made him a hundred times happier, than my mother was for receiving it! I learned something Godly from my father that day! My heart also grew that day! And to this day, I have him to thank for the size of my heart, which has been both a blessing and a curse! It is a blessing for those who are willing to accept and appreciate the tremendous love I have in my heart to offer and a curse to me; because to this day, I have no one willing to accept and appreciate it!

This was the kind of man my father was. A giving, loving and kind man! Then why were my tennis shoes so plastic that I could skate to school on them on any given cold winter day in N.E. Ohio? Because of the southern, old school Morals, Values & Ethics that my Parents were both reared with and which they believed in rearing me with. They didn’t believe that a child should have the best of everything. They believed that a child should learn to do without, first and to earn rewards.

Don’t get me wrong. I never wanted for anything, as far as the necessities and over the years, I had some special Christmases and Birthdays. And overall, I had a happy childhood. But I wore my share of used clothing and played with my share of used toys. I was also the brunt of many jokes. It took many years for me to understand the wisdom of their Child Rearing Philosophy, but when I stood at attention, beside my bunk,  in Basic Military Training that first night and the TI’s (Training Instructors) were throwing over beds and yelling and screaming and dumping everybody’s personal property on the floor and insulting us all; I began to understand. Not one TI could yell at me or hurt me half as much as my mother could and the depravation we had to endure, which many were facing for the first time, I grew up with. I had been well prepared for life’s let-downs. And those who know my story or who have read my book; know that I have suffered more than my fair share of life’s let-downs.

You see, many people can’t be happy, because they are too busy desiring and craving the material things and finances they believe will make them happy. I thank God that my parents reared me to be happy with what I have. Does that mean I don’t strive for more; of-course not… But what it does mean; is that I can be just as happy living on a park bench, as I can in a mansion. A skill that my parents taught me and that has come in handy more than once in my life. If the Electric Bill is past due, I am not worried. If my HBO has to go, I am OK. And if I have a taste for steak, I am able to be happy with Roma Noodles. To me, happiness is not a state of financial well being; but a state of mind. And worrying can’t change anything, because it doesn’t have the physical ability to. It is only evidence of our lack of faith in God, which is actually a road block to God making positive things happen in our lives. As Jesus said, I simply “Let the troubles of today, be sufficient for today…” I wait until tomorrow to deal with the troubles of tomorrow. This philosophy has been responsible for my peace of mind, during some very tough times.

My father stayed married to my mother for over 35 years, until he died. During that time, they separated one year and my mother took me and we moved out. I was in the fourth grade. But they got right back together that following year and never separated, again. To my knowledge, my parents never cheated on each other, ever. My parents had me involved in everything from Sports to playing Musical Instruments, to participating in Plays, Spelling-bees, Speech Contests, etc and even Traveling to Flea Markets all over and Selling Antiques. I even worked at my mother’s Antique Stores, as a child. I had done more and seen more in the first 16 years of my life, than many 40 year olds. I had been to more beaches, seen mountains, different places and dealt with so many different types of people, both rich and poor, of all different races, etc.

My father spent lots of time with me. I remember standing next to my father and pretending I was shaving, as he would shave. He taught me so many details that men don’t bother to teach anymore. He taught me how to wipe my penis after urinating. He taught me to always sit down and urinate and never to urinate standing up, unless necessary. That way, the bathroom and toilet stayed clean. And if I did stand up and urinate, to always lift the seat. He taught me to always clean the toilet and toilet seat for the next person, when I stood up. On Saturday, he had me in the yard helping to cut the grass, trimming the hedges, planting and watering flowers and in the garden planting, caring for and harvesting the vegetables. He would give me detailed instructions on how to work; how to work smart and not hard. He taught me how to use tools and how to enjoy getting my hands dirty. One time, he made me watch him wring a live Chicken’s Neck, which I didn’t like. But he wanted me to see how it was done. He said that a time may come when I will be required to hunt for food and to kill an animal, in order to eat. He said a man must have the heart and the stomach to do so.

There was no talking back to either of my parents, ever. There was no raising my voice, ever; even as an Adult. When I did something wrong, the neighbor whooped me; called my mother, who whooped me; who told my father; who whooped me and put me on punishment. And when I was on punishment, there was no getting off. If it was a week; I stayed on that entire week. Whatever I had done, I never did again.

My father taught me how to come home to your wife, every single night, by example. He taught me how to love one woman, by example. He taught me how to be a man, in so many different ways, by example. He was always there. And when I got into a car accident and he was in the car; he slammed into the windshield, knocking him unconscious and I thought he was dead! Oh God; please let him live! I cried out! This was the first time I realized how much I had loved this man! And many years later, when he went into a Coma; I begged God to spare him. When he exited the Coma, he saw people no one else could see. Either he was crazy or gifted. I don’t know which. But the day he began to not see them, was the day he asked “Dale, is there somebody standing over by the lamp?” I said “No.” He said “OK.” That was one of the most touching moments in my life, because he simply believed me; even though he saw that person just as clear as you see yourself, when you look in a mirror. He trusted me; his Son! I will never forget how my heart melted on that day!

My father eventually died, under circumstances that are unbelievable and incredible. I will not go into these circumstances, at this time. But I will say that before he died; I was notified one day, that he had established an account, in my name, that held $186,000.00. Now, this is surely not a million dollars; but considering where this man came from and the obstacles that he faced during his life; I am able to respect this accomplishment to the fullest! And I have to respect my mother in the fullest, for seeing this man for who he really was; a ‘Great Man’; a ‘Godly Man’ a ‘Hero’ and a ‘Superstar, Among Men’! A man who the Devil had disguised as an uneducated, country, drunk.

This was no ordinary man… this was a magnificent creation of God! And I know, deep within my heart that I am truly blessed and have a profound purpose in life, because he placed me with these wonderful people at the age of 7 months old. I have often asked God; out of all the children in need of parents; what makes me so special, that he would touch the hearts and minds of the most wonderful people in the world to adopt me? It has only been in recent years that I have begun to realize, that I am slated to contribute to the world. It is only of late, that I have been given clues and set in the right direction. But any success that I am slated for is certainly to the credit of God, first. And then, to my mother and the ‘Greatest Man I have ever known’! Eddie Davis… (My Father)

Filed under: Children, D-Source, Men, Philosophy, Recognition, Relationships, Relationships, The "Let's Change the WORLD" Movement, Unlimited Education for Our Children, Women | Posted on June 19th, 2011 by DSource4U

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